Outtakes Archives - Fucking Moskau

Julia

Three months after the move I move in with Julia near Mayakovskaya. Pink lace curtains, a gas cooker from the eighties – none of it matters, I think I’ve found the woman of my dreams. Then her birthday comes and I learn how Russian parties work: a restaurant for a thousand euros, presents worth two to three hundred. That evening I’m still thinking I want to marry her. The next morning she picks a fight over nothing. From then on it goes downhill – all the way to the sentence that says everything: in Russia a man pays for his woman.

Leaving the Island

Six months later Julia is standing at Tenerife airport – and I realise I don’t actually know this woman at all. One week of glass walls, sea views and terrace, then the tears come at the gate. Afterwards I stand alone at Medano beach and watch her plane go. New York or Moscow? When the landlord calls in September, I answer without thinking. At the beginning of October I leave the island at 30 degrees, with 180 kilos of excess baggage and a snowboard going down the belt.

At the Garage Club

Krysha, the Russian roof: do business here and you pay the mafia or the FSB. A night at the Garage Club between mafia daughters and Bolshoi ballerinas.

Victor and Victoria

Victor explains Moscow to me: if you want to do business, you come here – timber from the forest, diamonds from the Far East, it all runs through this city. Out in the country people earn 200 euros a month; here it’s one to three thousand. In the evening two women are at the door, fur coats off, high heels out of the handbag. Victor talks about his girlfriend as if she weren’t in the room – she doesn’t speak English, after all. Meanwhile I’m on the couch with a gynaecologist who earns 200 euros and does abortions on the side. And later, in the kitchen, I learn who’s underestimating whom.

The First Time

Five days in Moscow and I already want out. Nobody smiles, the managers serve arrogance with the coffee, and every interview ends the same way: without Russian we can’t use you. Victor sees it differently. Every evening he drags me through the best restaurants in town, closes the deal with girls in three minutes flat and introduces me as a professional surfer. Then he slips the bouncer a thousand roubles and walks me into the Shambala – private party, Bentleys on the pavement, nobody inside older than nineteen, free drinks paid for by daddy. And above us, a dance floor made of glass.

Arrival

Victor picks me up from the airport. “Welcome to Moscow, the city of sin,” he says. For two hours, we drive through bleak suburbs full of concrete blocks. The closer we get to the center, the nicer the buildings, the flashier the cars—Ladas alongside luxury vehicles with flashing lights. When we hit traffic, our driver veers onto the sidewalk. A woman with a stroller jumps aside. I’m shocked. Victor just shrugs: “Time is money.” Welcome to a world that plays by its own rules.

Trage Dich für meine Newsletter ein, um keine neue Story zu verpassen.

My spanish lady

The moment after

The morning after, we lie next to each other, exhausted from a night filled with passion, music, and dancing. It was a transgression, a forbidden adventure that briefly united us like Bonnie and Clyde—honest and free from expectations. She rests in my arms, seeking comfort, while I wonder if she could be the one. But thoughts of a shared future quickly fade, as we both know there is only the here and now. Every moment with her feels like a stolen second I want to hold onto before reality catches up with us again.

Svetlana the Swinger

The Swingers

An evening at an exclusive sex party in Moscow – driven by curiosity, I follow a friend’s invitation into a world that is both bizarre and fascinating. Amid high heels, collars, and unexpectedly profound conversations with the hostess Svetlana, a woman as passionate as she is charming, I immerse myself in a game of desire, power, and taboos. As the lines between freedom and control blur, I reflect on longing, fantasies, and the extraordinary stories that connect people. And in the end, one realization remains: sometimes life surprises you in the strangest ways.

Girl and Private Jet

Sex above the clouds?

A Thursday night at Solyanka, one of Moscow’s hottest clubs. Banker Chet dances in his suit, Elena flirts unabashedly, and Matt, the pilot of Russia’s elite, shares tales of wild parties above the clouds – the Mile High Club Deluxe. Between champagne, long legs, and tempting encounters, the night feels like a test. Temptation is everywhere, but reality catches up with me in the end. At home, I sit on the couch, reflecting on the evening and wondering if life is really this crazy – or if I just wouldn’t have it any other way.

Full Moon Moscow

Full Moon Over the City

A Night in Moscow: The bar is alive, while outside, a girl stands on the brink of death. Inside, an engagement shatters after a fling in the club bathroom, and a fatal accident casts a dark shadow over the morning. As the city slowly wakes, the narrator bears the weight of the night’s events – a mix of helplessness, guilt, and the harsh realities of life. Some stories end in the hospital, others with the police at the door. It was a full moon night – not extraordinary, just one that won’t be forgotten.

Berlin 2008

A Woman of Class

Berlin, 2008: Anika, seemingly the perfect woman, moves into my friend’s flatshare. A doctor, pilot, wealthy, and charming – she impresses everyone. Yet, cracks in her story begin to show: alleged trips to New York that never happen, unpaid rent, and a web of inconsistencies. As her network of friends and acquaintances unravels, it becomes clear that Anika isn’t who she claims to be. In the end, one question remains: Who was she really?

Pink New York 1997 Polaroid

Back to New York

After years in Moscow, I return to New York, once my home, now a city that feels foreign. The Upper East Side, with its wealth and coldness, and the East Village, once wild and untamed, now tamed by yuppies—nothing is as it was. In conversations with a taxi driver, cultural bridges between Christianity and Islam emerge, while the city envelops me with memories of parties, encounters, and a different version of myself. New York remains a challenge: hard, loud, fascinating—a place you love and yet question.

Girl in metro

Hot Salsa Dance in the Metro

Riding the Moscow Metro is often torture – cramped, stuffy, and sometimes an assault on the senses. Especially when a long-legged blonde in a secretary outfit is standing right in front of you. The train rattles, the crowd pushes, and suddenly her derrière is exactly where it shouldn’t be. Between her satin skirt and my jeans, a dance unfolds that promises more than the rush hour allows. As she steps off the train, our eyes meet. Her gentle smile lingers as she vanishes into the crowd – leaving me, despite the heat and stench, with a satisfied grin.

Socks

The (Smelly) Sock

Andrey, the manager of one of Russia’s top design studios, would probably rather be a DJ, but that doesn’t pay for his new Mercedes or his bills. During our “Kitchen Sessions,” he’s usually focused at his mixer while we talk about business, parties, and politics. Things get tense when the aggressive neighbor shows up at the door in his underwear. Later, I find a gray, smelly sock under the table that looks oddly familiar. At home, I realize: it was my sock, likely stuck in my pant leg – now thrown out. An embarrassing moment that still brings a smile.

Makeup Marvels

Sometimes it might be better to pay a prostitute who leaves afterward than waking up next to a woman who’s lost her charm from the night before. Her makeup is gone, her butt twice as big without a tight skirt, and her leg hair has left your thighs raw. As you battle your hangover and reality, she moves closer, talking about “us” and “we.” After a goodbye kiss, you swear to be more careful next time. But standing in the street, the midday sun on your face, all you can think is: Where am I? And why did I forget to use the bathroom?

Sexy woman in underwear

Brothels, Streetwalkers, and Dominatrixes

Sex on the clock for 100 euros? Not my thing. Sex should be about passion and tenderness, without watching the clock. Once, I stumbled drunkenly into a place like that, blew the cost of a 5-star vacation on booze and… well, didn’t even finish. No thanks. Better to steer clear of streetwalkers and brothels altogether. Even the few times I tried it, it was disappointing—from questionable mattresses to monotonous encounters. What remains? The search for variety, for someone who can be a pornstar today and a cuddler tomorrow.